Liturgy and Acknowledgement

In Morning Prayer for today the antiphon for the Canticle of Zechariah says,

This evil and faithless generation asks for a sign,
but no sign will be given it except the sign of the
prophet Jonah.

And guess the OT mass reading? This is a perfect illustration of what I was talking about a few days ago: the liturgy is a vital part of our mindset for each day. This antiphon is a sign in itself. We can safely assume that the antiphon, the Old Testament reading, and the Gospel reading are all the fitting subject of today's Lectio.

This morning I am compelled to say that were it not for my being able to attend mass at Gethsemani every morning I am able, then there would be no renunciations going on at all in my life. Were it not for the place itself, and it's influence on me, I would not be writing in this blog, attending church of any kind, and probably in a terrible state.

Place matters.

Monday, Week One, Lent

Here we go. Lent is here, we've had the first "Sunday of," and now the disciplines are geared up one notch. The Renunciations have begun, and I have a second one coming up. It could be third, but I'm not sure. Things are thickening in my life plot.

A quote from today's Universalis, New Style and Still Good.

Let me turn to what is of less importance: the visible world around us. What benefactor has enabled you to look out upon the beauty of the sky, the sun in its course, the circle of the moon, the countless number of stars, with the harmony and order that are theirs, like the music of a harp? Who has blessed you with rain, with the art of husbandry, with different kinds of food, with the arts, with houses, with laws, with states, with a life of humanity and culture, with friendship and the easy familiarity of kinship?

That's from a Sermon by St. Gregory Nazianzen. There's a lot of comfort there, and encouragement to persevere until the last moment. Even with a couple of renunciations glaring into my future, there is deep comfort in knowing that no matter what type of suffering it brings, it will never separate me from the love of God in Christ Jesus. That His total presence will only be met by my essentially ignoring him, even though I am thinking about it, breaks my heart.

Can I be small Lord Jesus? Can I sacrifice it all for you? Will you hold me if I fall? I know you will. I believe, help my unbelief.

Saturday before First Sunday of Lent

At mass this morning the Gospel reading was the calling of Levi with this text.

Jesus saw a tax collector named Levi sitting at the customs post.
He said to him, “Follow me.”And leaving everything behind, he got up and followed him. Then Levi gave a great banquet for him in his house...

A little something I like to do is ponder the narrative gap in the gospel readings. For instance, between Levi's "leaving everything behind," and when at some point later "Levi gave a great banquet...in his house." Clearly time has passed, things have happened, words have been said, between the call of Levi and the banquet.

A banquet is not something you throw together in an hour. It takes time to set up a banquet. That is something all of us should be able to understand...identify with...in this reading. But that is only one thing, the banquet. What about the moments right after Levi got up from his table and followed Jesus?

I am drawn to that moment when Levi first set eyes on Jesus. The first sight of Jesus must have set something into movement within Levi, because he got up and went! He did not stick around to make sure no one ran off with the tax money sitting out on the table. He just went.

Jesus in the flesh walking up to you...imagine such a moment. His eyes boring love into you. Could you do anything else but fall in love with him? If you cannot fall in love with God, who can you fall in love with?

Draw me, O Lord, to always be falling in love with you.

Then Jesus and Levi must have spent considerable time together, getting to know each other. What must that have been like for Levi? Can you find a bit of Levi in yourself? You're a sellout to the occupying power of Rome, and you are likely cut off from the major religious institutions. Then Jesus comes along, smiles at you(?) and becomes your best friend. In the human body of Jesus of Nazareth.

The gospels still speak even where they are silent. Nothing is recorded, it was merely a passage of time between the calling and the banquet, where the Evangelist used the compression of time so as not to be lost in irrelevant details.

What remains for us to do is to enter that compressed time. It will provide a cord leading very deep into your inner self and to God. It unravels all your secret sins. We have the advantage over Levi in one way only: we have Jesus with us, too.

Odd Scriptural Event

There is a Protestant way of seeing Jesus statement to Peter:

And so I say to you, you are Peter,
and upon this rock I will build my Church,
and the gates of the netherworld shall not prevail against it.
I will give you the keys to the Kingdom of heaven.
Whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven;
and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.

There is a Catholic way of seeing it as well.

The Protestant way of seeing it does not affirm a special authority for Peter.

That's where the odd event of the day happened. I was hearing the gospel passage as if I'd never heard it before. That's nothing new, it's a discipline I practice. Yet, today I realized that Jesus was indeed speaking to Peter himself.

Now, I do not believe that Jesus, or Peter, ever meant for something as grandiose as the church we have today. Catholic or Protestant. It reminds me of something St. Bernard said somewhere about Cluny that "your churches are covered in gold, but the poor remain hungry and naked." Or words to that effect.

Still, the Church is something run by human beings. Yet beneath all the corruption, and lusting for power, dominance, conformity that characterizes much of what goes on in the Churches, there remains the simple truth of the gospel.

God is unknowable, unseeable;
we do not know if we even come close to God
except by faith. I have faith in God.
And, I have faith in the Sacraments.
Without the Sacraments I am not near enough to God.

Ash Wednesday

Be sure today to check out the Old Style Breviary. The First Nocturne of Matins is particularly interesting. Good Lectio can proceed from Liturgy.

Mass readings.

Universalis.

Okay, back to the Old Style. People ask me why I like the old liturgy so much. My answer is two parts. One, I would never want it in Latin. If you do not understand the words, what good is it? Then it's nothing more than a song on AM radio to which you know the tune, but not the words.

Two. It is my belief that all liturgy is designed to bring us into a state of mind where we can be receptive to the Holy Spirit. It should be beautiful, and it should also be written in words of venerable use. It should not be written in words that are so archaic as to require a dictionary. Each liturgy has a structure. Each part of the liturgy--hymns, antiphons, psalms, readings, responsories--informs the rest, gives it the fullness of meaning. It points to mindsets that of holiness.

Can you keep the concepts? Lord, have mercy.

Hymns in the Eastern Church

The first time I heard any music, or hynmody of the Eastern Churches was at St. Michael's Orthodox Church, in Louisville. Part of the service was sung in various eastern languages, but there was good bit of English sung as well. The experience sparked a life long interest for me. What were those tunes? How old was this stuff? It sounded ancient in a very visceral way. And the words! When I finally found the words it was again an immersion in something very strange and different from the way things were in my world.

Here's a for instance:

Fasting is bright and beautiful for any who are bright enough
To gaze on God. The Turbid One, stirred up by anything
Cannot fix the eye on that Clear One. He who possesses a clear eye
He can gaze upon him; as much as it is given to him to gaze.
Instead of the clarifying wine, let us clarify our thought
So that we will be able to see the Clear One
Who overcame the Evil One by means of fasting, that Disturber of All.

That's a verse from St. Ephraim's Hymns on Fasting. References to evil are personified and given titles: Turbid One; Disturber of All. It is true that sin and temptation do disturb us, and cloud our clear water with the mud of sin. They are titles of specific sins. If our water is all stirred up we can't possibly see the Clear One.

Have Your Read...

Monastic Practices, by Charles Cummings, OCSO? If not, pick up a copy. This is the book that will be my Lenten discipline. I've had it for some time, and even read it, but now it's time to turn it into Lectio.

While skimming through it I noticed chapter 4, "Short Prayers." St. Augustine of Hippo wrote about it. Much Eastern Orthodox mysticism is built upon the practice of short prayers...and seriously, this is what they are called...aspirations and ejaculations.

Here's a rather long list of possible prayers. They are called seven-syllable prayers.

1. Kyrie eleison.
2. Maranatha, O Lord come!
3. Lord Jesus, praised be your name.
4. Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.
5. Jesus Healer, make me whole.
6. Lord, give me a heart of flesh.
7. Free me for your love, O Lord. (my favorite on the list)
8. Father, Jesus, Spirit -- One.
9. Jesus, I submit to you.
10. May your presence give me peace.

You may also use single words, phrases, or even, as The Cloud of Unknowing says, a single syllable. Cummings gives a how-to form making your own. And that is where he gets most interesting. First, what he has to say.

The prayer should be personally meaningful and satisfying, and should emphasize praise, love, healing, redemption.

That is a great deal of meaning to fit into basic seven-syllable prayers. To form a prayer like, one must be in touch themselves, and God within. Then we begin to be sensitive enough to discern the subtle movements of the Holy Spirit.

It's all just another way to remember to "pray always."

Approaching Lent at Full Speed

Lent is less than a week away. Oh boy, now everything goes purple. In Bryan's blog he writes about his plans for lenten discipline. He's ahead of me, because I haven't even found a book of daily meditations for lent. I'm still working on Fully Human Fully Divine by Michael Casey, so it might become my lenten reading.

Fasting always comes up at this time of year. I think too often we focus on food fasts, and less on fasting from certain secret sins that allow us to feel just a little bit holier than others. Fasting can be tough for people with health problems, but for everyone else it is a good and holy practice. The object is not to make ourselves sick, or to lose weight. It is self denial with a purpose, not just for the sake of self denial. We deny ourselves in order to come one step closer to obedience to God.

Mass readings.

Breviary old style.

And, new style.

What Does It Mean to be a Lay Cistercian?

Breviary for St. Valentine. Universalis for Cyril and Methodius

That is the theme of my day. The group reflection papers are sorta in, and I've at least got a clue where to go with this paper. It's a responsibility when you write with the voice of your community, and not your own. Staying faithful to the voice of community is surprisingly exhilarating. We'll see if the others are happy with it.

Our task was to discover what precisely separates Cistercian from regular Christian. "Is it possible to live a Cistercian lifestyle in the world?" There is a touch of silliness in that question because living a Cistercian lifestyle in your heart and life matters a great deal more than whether or not you live in a monastery. On the other hand, the quesiton makes perfect sense. It all comes down to a line drawn in the sand--the definition of lifestyle. Monks and nuns live in monastic enclosure. Lay people live in the secular world. How to live in the secular world is the choice of lifestyle that we make as Lay Cistercians. The question then really asks us how do we use our Cistercian values in our lifestyle choices.

Being a Lay Cistercian must be something that comes from the heart. If you are not one in your heart, then you are not one even if you live in a monastery. The lifestyle of the monastic community is very different from the Lay Cistercian groups. Still, as one respondent wrote. "If it doesn't make sense in the world, then it doesn't make sense in the monastery, or anywhere."

Reflection Papers and BL Humbeline

I have never heard of her. Turns out she is the sister of St. Bernard. That's interesting that she should be today, because St. Scholastica was just a couple of days ago. Still, I wonder what is known of her life, because I have never heard of her. But, look what I found. I don't know if there are propers for the day, sorry.

All Lay Cistercian groups world wide are now working on answers to the questions that strike to the core of the legitimacy of our experience. What does being an Lay Cistercian mean? How does it affect your life? Can one be a Lay Cistercian and live in the secular world? Some responses are starting to come in now. This is not going to be an easy response for anyone, and not just at LCG either. Putting into words how the Holy Spirit acts in our lives is no easy task.

It strikes me how with all the LC groups worldwide answering this question, is this not a clear operation of the Holy Spirit? What an honor to be a part of it.

Melismatic Chant and 6th Sunday of Ordinary Time

Today the gospel was the Sermon on the Mount, by Luke. In his sermon Fr. Allen pointed out that while Matthew tells the same story essentially, there is a difference. Matthew has eight "Happy are" statements. Luke has four of those, and four "Woes." Part of the beauty of the readings today is the seeming nonsequitur nature of the statements themselves. It is all antithetical to what we in our world conditioned state believe to be true. How do we live it out?

On to the melisma singing today. A melisma is a musical term that means more than one note is sung in one syllable. It is used most often in chant for the ends of a phrase. It can be described as a leaf that swings gently, side to side, as it falls to earth. It is a form of emphasis, that gives the music a lilting quality. By the end of the entrance chant I was already hearing to myself, "By the waters of Babylon." Why? I don't know. Probably the melisma.

Music has great power. What a shame so few people find it.

St. Scholastica

In honor of the sister of St. Benedict, I offer the First Nocturne of Matins, Old Style. Remembering of course, that hagiography (a saint biography) is not a literal rendering. Still, it's magnificent. Read the Responsory also.

R. Ride on because of the Word of truth, of meekness, and righteousness : * And thy right hand shall teach thee terrible things.
V. In thy comeliness, yea, in thy beauty, go forth, ride prosperously, and reign.
R. And thy right hand shall teach thee terrible things.

That responsory does not show up in the Common of Virgins. It could be from some other proper, but I doubt it. The application to Scholastica strikes me as odd. She is not someone that committed terrible things. Of course, what does the word terrible really mean? It has several meanings. Still, it does seem odd to apply this particular Responsory to St. Scholastica!

Perhaps it has something to do with the first reading tells of the flood that prevented Benedict from going back to his cell. Benedict prays for forgiveness for Scholastica because she -- she what? She made the storm happen? Of course not. Yet it is interesting that Benedict just accepted that she had made it happen. Why pray for her forgiveness otherwise?

That says something about the quality of both their prayers. This is not a story about a nature-witch, it is a story of the prayer of faith. The Sts. Benedict and Scholastica were known as people with such great faith that they could "move mountains." The prayer of faith is a prayer of power. The prayer of faith can accomplish anything. In that light the Responsory makes more sense.

R. Ride on because of the Word of truth, of meekness, and righteousness : * And thy right hand shall teach thee terrible things.
V. In thy comeliness, yea, in thy beauty, go forth, ride prosperously, and reign.
R. And thy right hand shall teach thee terrible things.

Mass, Trappist Style

This morning at mass something interesting occurred to me. As a church musician it would make sense that the lack of music on Monday's and Friday's would depress me.

It doesn't.

In fact, on those two days the mass is a truly silent event. All the right words are said very clearly, it's not a mumbler mass, it's said distinctly, and with reverence. And I love it. There is something wonderful about the absolute stillness during communion; or the moments when the gates open and the guests go forward to take their seats.

The nave of the church is dark. Each one carries a little space of shadow around them. After all, it is not yet dawn. The altar is lighted, and somehow that light does not disturb. It's natural there, providing focus. The silences, while not long, seem to lengthen each moment so that they go on forever.

On days with music the nave is not quite so dark. There is more light intruding into each ones personal space. There is a book and two printed sheets, and that's just to keep up with the most simple parts of the service. It has its own beauty, to be sure. The chanting beats so close to the actual rhythm of our hearts, pumping blood and faith into the world. Many in attendance are only used to large Sunday services, where the character of the worship is not only celebratory, but also communal in nature. It is an event.

I am not a member of the monastic community. None of those who attend mass each morning before work are members of the community either. Yet, there is a sense of connectedness. After a while you start to be remembered, then when the priest knows your name at communion it creates a sense of belonging -- not findable ever before -- that fills the soul.

I do not know these monks. They do not know me. Our only real encounter is with Christ when they give me the host and the cup. Seen in that light, the sense of belonging makes much more sense.

Wednesday is Just a Weekday

The mass readings all week have been from Genesis. When you get right down to it, Genesis is both a profound and a brutal book. So far we've only made it to the Garden of Eden, but things will get bad soon for Adam and Eve. But check out the old style readings for Matins/Vigils. Might as well drop by Universalis.

Fr. Michael celebrated this morning. When he says mass it is always such a quiet experience. I like that, nothing aggressive in his tone or his words. When he calls us to reflection it is with a skill that shows just how deep his soul really is.

Today I will have the first physical exam I've had in over fifteen years. I both look forward to it, and dread it. The dread is the time it takes. Morning is my most productive time of day. A physical in the middle of the morning eats into my writing schedule.

I am pleased to report that the topic of the next paper on my agenda is the role of the Abbot for the Lay Cistercians. At this point I'm doing research and have no conclusions, or assumptions, beyond being edified by the research itself. That will mix well with the response paper I will be collating and writing my Lay Cistercian community. I believe that it is the duty of everyone who is able, to take the fruit of their studies and turn their insights into a paper for the edification of others. If any good writers emerge I will encourage them to write something for CSQ. Every movement has its writers.

The Whole Megillah

1. Judaism The scroll containing the biblical narrative of the Book of Esther, traditionally read in synagogues to celebrate the festival of Purim.

2. Slang A tediously detailed or embroidered account: told us the whole megillah.

Readings old style.

New style. It's good too!

Mass readings. Must have those.

This far into non smoking I am realizing how deeply into the land of renunciation this experience takes me. Sins and issues are lining up now, ready to be met with, face to face, before Almighty God. Does that sound dramatic? So be it. It is certainly having a dramatic impact on my life. The danger, of course, is of me trying to take charge of the part that belongs to God, and not doing anything about the part that belongs to me.

I did not, and to some extent, still do not want to stop smoking. No heavy smoker ever really wanted to stop smoking. So, the inner disposition to stop smoking cigarettes was brought about by God. The act then belonged to me. I acted. It feels like a cop out to say that God has to arrange my inner disposition before I do any decisive action, but it certainly is the most powerful and prominent of my thoughts. In prayer I can feel something happening in my inner dispositions, yet I can't say exactly what. When I say feel it happening in my inner dispositions, it means a change in my heart, not a voice, or electric shock. Lectio is different now, as well. Everything is pointing to Habakkuk 2:3b,4

"If it should tarry, wait for it, for it will surely come."

So, I ask anyone who might read this to please pray for me in this endeavor. Also, email me if you want to tell me how I can pray for you. My email. We all live on the power of our prayers for one another.

On a different note. I was thinking about the answers to the questions all Lay Cistercian groups around the world are writing. More particularly, about the answers that my own group is writing, and which I have been asked to put together into one paper. I view it as an honor. My excitement about the paper is bound up in my excitement to be involved with such a new charism. The very first Lay Cistercian groups only began to form in early 1980's. The Cistercian Order is Nine hunred nine years old. Now, at the very beginning there were lay brothers. All along there have been lay brothers, but now there lay brothers and sisters, who do not live in the monastery. We live in what they might have called the granges.

So much remains. What a joy!

Feast of the Presentation, Fourteenth day in Non-Smoking Season

I think there should be Propers for the Sunday, and the weekdays, of the Non-Smoking Season. Each year it would be meaningful if I kept the personal Solemnity, and the Fourteenth Day. Haha! Who knows? It might be fun.

I was reading at my favorite early morning site, the Aldaily, and found a book review of two new books on Bach. The article is interesting because there is some discussion of Bach's faith in the book.

Here is a quote.

Williams strives to believe that such beauty is there to seduce the intended audience of believers, so that they would pay attention to the words. But did they hear the beauty, those Leipzigers who had no experience of such expressively intense and long-range effects being achieved with tonal harmony? Perhaps Bach was on his own, or in a relationship of two. As Williams concludes: "One can believe that Bach was at his most devout not when his sacred music moved or delighted his neighbour but when it was so complex that only he and his Maker understood it."

That's an interesting viewpoint, because on every manuscript Bach finished, he wrote, "Sola Dei Gloria." To God be the Glory. And, a great deal that is most fascinating about Bach is how he hid many of his treasures in the music itself. He hides it in structure.

A note sounds. Then it sounds again. But everything has changed. Not only is the note colored by a different resonance the second time around, but featureless time has been marked with the beginnings of a grid. The one note at the start defined only a before and an after. The second discloses a pulse. In accordance with this pulse, a third sound appears, but up a step, encouraging the accompaniment—which has not drawn attention to itself so far—to move conversely down.

We have reached only the beginning of the second measure of the Goldberg Variations and already a process is at work, a process that will be partly completed at the end of this measure but whose every completion will imply continuation. This first two-measure phrase will summon another, and so on, until there is a whole thirty-two-measure dance, which will be only the beginning of a chain of such pieces, again thirty-two in number.

That is a stunning statement.

Feast of the Presentation

Readings

Old Style

Art